Every April, during National Autism Awareness and Acceptance Month, we pause to think back on the pivotal role students and clients have played in our lives and work. For professionals like us, who seek to develop helpful tools to understand the perspective and input of those we learn alongside and teach. Autistic, as well as other neurodivergent individuals, have been helping shape the Social Thinking® Methodology and our own personal learning journeys for over two decades.

Long Term Learning

For almost 30 years, those with whom we’ve worked have been our toughest critics and best teachers. If something wasn’t working for them, they let us know. If the lessons weren’t relevant, they really let us know. On the flip side, they also helped us learn what they liked and what made sense in their lives. Some of the lessons inspired by and developed alongside our clients include: What does “being social” even mean? How do we share space with others? How do we get in and out of groups? Why do people make small talk? How do people magically pop into groups? How do people make friends? The Social Thinking Methodology continues steadfastly to value working alongside individuals to break down complicated abstract social concepts into clear and relevant terms for their brains, may process social information differently. Our role is to help individuals make gains related to their own social, academic, and life goals. We do this by honoring and asking for student/client input and feedback because our clients and their families continue to be our best teachers, if we are willing to listen. Below are more points of knowledge and inspiration that continue to influence our work and thinking today.

10 Points of Inspiration from Neurodivergent Social Learners

1. Social concepts should not be taught in a linear or rigid way. They are based on needs and goals.

2. Always begin by learning from the person to understand their point of view. Seek to understand their past socially based experiences. Always focus on learning how you can be of help to this individual and adapt how you help them as their awareness of social dynamics evolves. Support is never about changing the person.

3. We are all unique learners, so one approach, tool, or strategy (including from the Social Thinking Methodology) is not for everyone. First understand the interests, strengths, goals, and social motivation of the individual prior to determining which supports make sense for that person and their goals.

4. An individual’s motivation to participate is usually proportionate to lessons relevant to what they want and need to learn to help them meet their own social goals and not necessarily what another person wishes.

5. Neurodivergents, including autistics, are empathetic and care about how others treat them, interact with them, or include them. They also care about others and want to build and maintain mutually respectful relationships.

6. Those with social learning differences, difficulties, or disabilities do want to learn about their social selves and the intentions of others, particularly when engaged in social learning that honors and respects their strengths and good intentions.

7. Avoid assuming the individual understands the social dynamics of contexts in which they participate, regardless of strong intelligence.

8. The social experience begins with making sense of what’s happening in a situation, including the roles of the different people and what they’re trying to accomplish.

9. There is value in studying the social world by observing specific situations and learning through systematic teaching frameworks (e.g., 4 Steps of Communication, 5 Steps of Being with Others) to unpack specific aspects of the social world that occur across contexts and cultures.

10. Experiencing social anxiety is common for all people when feeling socially vulnerable. All educators should have awareness of strategies that not only encourage learning social competencies, but also help individuals learn to recognize and manage their anxiety.

Today, we continue as students of our clients who are our teachers. We explicitly let them know—over time—what they’ve taught us. If we could all think of ourselves as both teachers and learners, then we can collectively help each other on the social learning journey we call life. Thank you to every person who has been, and will be, our teachers.